


Naruto Uzumaki vs. the World

by EccentricArctic



Category: Naruto
Genre: Multi, Scott Pilgrim References, Scott Pilgrim vs. the World, Scott Pilgrim vs. the World Script
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-19
Updated: 2017-01-19
Packaged: 2018-09-18 15:59:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 774
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9392513
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EccentricArctic/pseuds/EccentricArctic
Summary: Naruto Uzumaki has never had a problem getting a girlfriend. It's getting rid of them that proves difficult. From the girl who broke his heart-and now is back in town-to the teenage distraction he's trying to shake when Sasuke rollerblades into his world, love hasn't been easy. He soon discovers, however, his new crush has the most unusual baggage of all: a nefarious league of exes controls her love life and will do whatever it takes to eliminate him as a suitor.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This script is thoroughly written word to word from Scott Pilgrim vs. the World series. I give full credit to their rightful owners: Bryan Lee O'Malley, Edgar Wright, and Michael Bacall. It is a Naruto AU and strictly posted for fun and seeing another world using my favorite characters. Hope you guys enjoy! I am currently working on another RP using the Scott Pilgrim universe but with a twist~

To the thunderous tones of Guitar Wolf’s cover of Eddie Cochran’s ‘Summer Blues’ we can see the snowy suburbs of Toronto. And from one nondescript house we can hear…..

Hinata Hyuuga   
“Naruto Uzumaki is dating a high schooler!”

Kitchen - Day  
The three members of SEX BOB-OMB and their one superfan lounge around a small kitchen table. 

Shikamaru Nara ,25, ponytail, drinking coffee (weak).

Shikamaru Nara  
“Really? Is she hot?”

Hinata Hyuuga, 22, cute, bitter, drinking coffee (bitter).

Hinata Hyuuga  
“How old are you now, Naruto? Like twenty-eight?”

Naruto  
“I’m twenty-two. Twenty-two!”

Shikamaru Nara  
“And you’re dating a high school girl? Not bad, not bad.”

Young Konohamaru, 17, Superfan Number 1, drinking coffee (milky).

Young Konohamaru   
“Like, did you guys ‘do it’ yet?

Naruto Uzumaki, 22, fresh faced with an unruly yet adorable mop of hair, drinking coffee (sugary).

Naruto  
“Well, we sort of ride the bus and she tells me about how yearbook club went and about her friends and you know.. drama.”

Shikamaru Nara  
“Yeah, okay, have you even kissed her?”

Naruto  
“We almost held hands once, but then she got embarrassed.” 

Hinata Hyuuga  
“Well, aren’t you pleased as a punch?”

Shikamaru Nara  
“So, what’s her name?”

Naruto  
(pleased as a punch)  
Shion. She’s Chinese.

Young Konohamaru pauses his Game Boy Advanced.

Young Konohamaru   
“Wicked! How’d you meet her?”

Naruto  
“I believe I mentioned the bus?”

Naruto Uzumaki prepares to tell an amazing story:

The Bus - Day

Shion and Mother sit side by side on the bus.

Mother  
“You are seventeen year old! Time to get interested in boy!”

Shion  
“Mom!”

Shion DROPS her bookbag, books scattering everywhere.

Mother  
“You drop books.”

Shion crouches down to pick up her books, grumbling. 

Naruto  
“Hey…”

Shion looks up to see Naruto Uzumaki holding her books.   
FUN FACTS appear in on-screen box:

“Naruto Uzumaki, 21 years old, rating: awesome”

Stars appear in Shion’s eyes. Naruto grins heroically. 

Naruto (Cont’d)  
“Don’t worry about it.”

Shikamaru Nara’s Kitchen- Continuous

Back in the kitchen, everyone looks at Naruto…

Hinata Hyuuga  
“Is this seriously the end of the story?”  
Naruto  
“Yes.”

Young Konohamaru unpauses his Game Boy Advanced. 

Shikamaru Nara  
“So when do we get to meet her?”

Hinata Hyuuga   
“Oh please. Let it be soon.”

DINGY DONG. (That’s the doorbell ringing. Duh.)

Naruto  
“I’ll get it.”

Shikamaru Nara House - Evening 

Shion stands outside. Naruto opens the door a crack.

Naruto  
“You promise to be good?”

Shion  
“Of course, I’ll be good!”

Naruto  
“No really. Please be good.”

 

Shion  
“I’ll be good! Am I normally not?”

Shikamaru Nara comes to the door and peers through.

Naruto  
“Oh, hey. Shion, this is Shikamaru Nara. He’s the talent.”

Shikamaru Nara  
“Are you good?”

Shion  
“Yes?”

Nara closes the door and confers with NARUTO.

Shikamaru Nara  
“Level with me. Is she going to geek out on us or whatever?”

Naruto  
“She’ll just sit in the corner, man.”  
Shikamaru Nara  
“I mean, I want her to geek out.”

Naruto   
“She’ll geek out so much, you won’t be able to get a nerd in edgeways.”

Shikamaru Nara opens the door again. Fast. Welcomes Shion.

Shikamaru Nara  
“So, come on in.”

Shikamaru Nara’s House - Evening 

Shion cautiously enters, and we get a good look at the pad: Bare bulb, ratty rug, drums, guitar, bass, LAME BRAND amps.

Shion  
“Wow.”

Naruto  
“Shion, that’s hinata. You can throw your coat wherever.” 

Naruto throws Shion’s coat on the floor. Shion gives a small, embarrassed wave.

Shion  
“Hi, sorry, what was your name?”

Hinata Hyuuga  
“Hinata Hyuuga.”

Shion  
“You play the drums?”

REVEAL Hinata sitting behind the drumset, sticks in her hands.

Hinata Hyuuga  
“...yes…”

Shion  
“That is so awesome.”

Young Konohamaru enters, cautiously sits next to Shion.

Naruto  
“Shion, this is Young Konohamaru.”

Shion  
“What do you play?”

Young Konohamaru   
“Game Boy Advanced mostly, ha.”

Shion stares blankly at Young Konohamaru.

Young Konohamaru   
“Yeah, no, I just live here.”

Sex Bob-omb has geared up. Amps hum to life.

Naruto  
“Let’s start with Launchedpad McQuack.”

Shikamaru Nara  
“That’s not the actual title of the--”

Hinata Hyuuga  
“WE ARE SEX BOB-OMB! 1-2-3-4!”

Hinata BASHES the kit and Sex Bob-omb EXPLODES INTO ROCK! GUITAR AND BASS LEADS LEAP INTO THE AIR, SPELLING OUT THE ELECTRIC TITLE OF THE FILM ABOVE THE BAND:

NARUTO UZUMAKI VS. THE WORLD

TITLES SEQUENCE continues over the song. The small rehearsal space seems to GROW with the music. Shion watches, mouth ajar. The song winds down, feedback lingers.

Shion  
“You guys are s amazing…” 

A final powerchord BLAST from the power trio ENDS TITLES. 

Bus Stop - Night  
Naruto bids adieu to a stunned Shion as she gets on a bus. 

Shion  
“I can’t even.. Sex Bob-omb. Wow.”


End file.
